Not My Cupid
by sen whitefox mako red demon
Summary: Young love is ready to blossom on this lovely day of romance, and Mira is just dying to see it unfold, unfortunately she's been given serious restrictions thanks to last years incident. To make matters worse a certain cat does not approve of the young couple, and is willing to do whatever it takes to make hearts break. It seems that Mira is gonna have to be extra sneaky this year!


Not My Cupid

 **Author Notes: So yeah...we've had this idea since Christmas...but due to a lack of time and energy we decided to postpone this idea till Valentines day and...well if any of you have read our other one shots for this week, then you'll see that...yeah we forgot up until five days before the due date.**

 **So apologies for any errors or screw ups in any of our work! Also for the record...this is not a canon story to my Assassins Hand story. As in this one Mira x Laxus. Sooooo take this story as one that is just a fun little spin off involving my characters. Anyways please enjoy~ We do not own Fairy Tail.**

 _3rd P.O.V_

The guildhall was as crowded as ever. Waitresses, customers, and mages alike were hustling and bustling, Mirajane especially. **"Ohhh love is in the air~"** Today was probably her most favorite holiday of the year.

Of course that made people who had crushes very VERY wary of the white haired woman. As last year at a party she decided to play cupid and shoot multiple people with love magic filled arrows. The results...led to some terrible results.

So she was given some rather strict restrictions and was forced to work instead of going about and trying to matchmake. Much to everyones' (who isn't already a couple) relief. But today, she got to see(without her prompting) young love bloom~

 **"Wendy, wi-will you goonadatewithme!?"** The blue haired dragon slayer giggled, thankful that her strong sense of hearing picked up on his question. **"I'd love too~"** Mira sighed in pure bliss. **"They're so cute together!"** Lucy and Sonya were watching the demon mistresses squeal and fantasize about the pair.

Sonya sipped her drink, thankful that she herself already had a boyfriend, and wouldn't be caught up in any of the infamous antics the model was known for. Poor Lucy though...her only savior was Loki who had yet to arrive and save the blond from the twinkling blue orbs.

Shai sat unhappily on the counter, much to his owners surprise. Though she made no comment, already well aware as to why he's so grouchy. **"You know you're overreacting yes?"** The lavender furball stares at his master, the pout still there.

 **"But milady! Miss. Wendy is the only other dragon slayer other then Sir Rogue that has my absolute respect and praise! She exhibits class and elegance while that-Boy, symbolizes...the salamander. From appearance, to magic! He does not deserve to court the blue haired maiden."**

The editor chuckles slightly, it has been quite some time since she's seen him so amendment about something. **"I do believe that despite your claims, that it is her choice in the matter no?"** She takes another sip, savoring the taste, hiding a smile behind the glass.

Her loyal feline grumbles in annoyance, knowing Sonya had a valid point. Then she saw it, an expression of realization crosses his face, before a wicked smirk, his rather intellectual, yet disturbing mind was at work.

 **"I do believe i'll be off...Helping Miss. Wendy."** With an amused hmph Sonya waved the exeede off. Granting her permission. **"I'll be here till nightfall, then Lucy and I will be going on our double date."** As much as Shai wanted to protest the event...he didn't.

Simply because he feared he'd be missing one of his nine lives should he try intervening on his mistress's date. **"Waiiiit! Shai come here!"** Mira waved him over. **"Yes Miss. Mira?"** She smiled at the polite cat.

Handing him a little necklace. **"I got you and the other exeedes something for Valentines Day~ Won't you wear it for me?"** Now Shai wasn't one for jewelry, as it usually got in the way when he was off doing assignments.

However you absolutely, do not say no to Mirajane Strauss. That and she chose a nicely designed collar for him. It was white, with elegant silver designs, topping it off with a single bell.

It was...sophisticated, classy, and complimented his fur well! **"Thank you Miss. Mira."** After helping him put it on around his neck, she waves him off. **"Have a good day Shai~"** Her voice was a tad bit too cheery. Lucy and Sonya both shared a glance. Whatever made her happy meant trouble...

 _Meanwhile..._

Wendy and Romeo were walking down the street, side by side, holding each other's hand. At first, the pair were overly hesitant, not wanting to cross the other's limits of what to and what not to do.

Despite their nervousness, they found themselves very excited as their destination was closer and closer with each step they take. Their first date would be taking place at a little carnival in honor of Valentine's day~

 **"What do you want to do first Romeo?"** He glances around the entrance, his eyes landing on one of the game booths. **"Let's play that!"** Eagerly the pair walk over to the elder gentleman.

He offers the youngbirds a kind smile. **"Welome~ Here you have three magic enhanced bottles standing in a pyramid. Infusing your magic into it you throw the ball as hard as you can to knock it over. If your not a magician then that's fine too as I have a none magic fused version of the game, wanna try it?"**

On the side of the booth, right next to the rules is another sign _ **. 'NO HIGH LEVEL MAGES-ESPECIALLY FAIRY TAIL MAGES!'**_ Fortunately Wendy was just under the line of being considered a high level mage.

Not to mention like most of her older members, she had something called self control. **"Good luck Romeo~"** He aimed carefully, his hopes was to impress the young dragon slayer and give her one of the cute plushys on the shelf.

Underneath the little table holding the bottles was Shai. He was snickering to himself as he heard the trio of people talking. The moment he stepped out of the guildhall he flew at blinding speeds far ahead of the newly formed couple to the carnival.

Already well aware of their plans due to his hearing. He was determined to sabotage their lovey dovey time and make the date end in failure. Already he destroyed any and all attempts of accessing the tunnel of love ride.

It was a good thing no one was in there at the time, making things a lot easier to mess with it. And now he was at the game booth. His plan was simple, using glue he made all the bottles stick together.

If they're stuck together, then they won't fall, Wendy will be disappointed if not judgmental of Romeo and create a rough start for the pair. It was absolutely perfect... **"Ok, here I go~** " That is to say, if the glue dries in time.

Since the glue he used in general isn't a quick dry, and also was not compatible with magic fused objects, slowing the drying time further. So when Romeo threw his fire magic infused ball, it clashed against the pyramid.

Just barely knocking every single one over. All three sticky bottles and the ball collapse above the exeedes head. **"Congrats young man! Please pick a prize~"** A cute little heart plushy was chosen and given to the blunette, causing her to blush.

 **"Oh thank you! I love it."** Shai growled underneath the table, wincing as he ripped the bottles off his fur. Clunks of his beautiful hair coming off, he was not happy. The substance clamping together on him was extremely uncomfortable.

Fortunately he brought a solvent to get rid of the glue(as he only wanted to ruin Wendy and Romeo's game) The good news was the fact that the solvent did the trick and he was freed from the gunk. Bad news was that he stunk, the aroma that clung to his body was comparable to the scent of fish.

Sighing he flapped his wings, searching for the lovers in hopes of having a new idea. Staying in the sky he observed them having a grand time, trying other games. He had to be patient so that he doesn't make the same mistake as last time.

 **"Do you wanna get something to eat Wendy?"** A grin spread across the purple furballs face as he swooped down to the food stand. **"Can I have a cheeseburger please?"** There was no way he could screw up this time!

Taking Romeo's sandwich he added a strong dose of laxatives. He couldn't wait for the teen to take a bite of the burger~ Just a single nibble would be enough to send him straight to the port a potty!

Anticipating Romeo's terrible reaction Shai hid in plain sight. Using a disguise kit he received from his mistress two birthdays ago he sits happily in an underlay layer of what seemed to be a trash can. Beady little eyes glowing in excitement.

Although luck just didn't seem to be on his side, as the one to receive the terribly changed burger was not Romeo. **"Dammit!"** But Natsu **. "Awesome there's my burger, yum, hot peppers, hot sauce, literal flames mmm~"** The pink haired dragon slayer took a huge bite of the burger.

A confused expression on his face as Romeo and Wendy get their own meals. **"What's wrong Natsu-nii san?"** Still eating the odd tasting food he replies. **"Don't know, something seems...weird about the way it tastes."**

Shrugging it off he still continues to eat it. Walking away, just barely passing the garbage Shai made and hid in when he finished. **"!"** A reaction came the moment he finished the final bite, dipping his head into the bin.

Spewing magma into the bottom. Shai was so glad he had that under layer for the actual bottom, though he was still burning up from the intensity of the heat the lava puke gave off.

It had to be at least ten minutes before Natsu made scorch marks on the ground to head to the portable bathrooms. So Shai had to use all the strength he had to push his way out of his own disguise. Pushing the deadly lava out. **"Phew!"** The cool air being an instant relief.

The relief however couldn't last for long, as Wendy and Romeo had themselves just finished their food and were ready to do some more exploring. Weary yet still motivated the cat was determined to make third time the charm.

Especially since he saw the two teens walk into a house of mirrors. An evil idea came about. Now this little fun house was one where cute little illusions would appear to entertain the children and love struck couples.

But one thing that separated exeedes such as Happy from his Jing counterpart, was Shai's utter will and enhancements in magical skills. He, during his multiple adventures with both his ex master and current master he had a tendency to learn some dark arts.

This one compared to some more difficult spells was simple and for the most part harmless. Instead of casting illusions, anyone who would enter(or in this case get pushed in) would be transported somewhere within a hundred miles from the mirrors position.

 **"You're lucks run out little Romeo~"** Not even bothering to be subtle he flies in and pushes the pair apart, sending Romeo into the mirror. **"Ah!"** Wendy turns around. **"Romeo?"** She twists her head left and right, searching for the boy.

Only for him to appear through another mirror not even two feet away from her. He still stumbling ends up accidentally smacking his lips onto hers. Poor poor Shai in his shock, loses control of his magic.

Stumbling into a different mirror, transporting him to...the shooting range competition taking place on the other side of the fair. Currently the holder of the contest was explaining to the audience and competitors.

 **"Alright ladies and gents here's the rules! I have crafted a purple cat shaped balloon holding a little target. That target when hit is worth 1000 points! Among it are other balloon shapes creatures ranging from 1 point to 100. Your goal is to rack up the most points by the time limit of five minutes!"**

Shai gulped quietly realizing that he had somehow replaced the purple cat balloon that was intended for the shoot out. And sadly for him two of the participants was Bisca and Alzak from Fairy Tail, otherwise known as the sharp shooters.

 **"BEGIN!"**

Time seemed to move too fast for Shai, as the longer he dodged every single bullet, the more cocky and into the game he was. The crowd was cheering as the shooters did the absolute best to hit him.

A few not bothering went to get points from the slower and less mobile _'balloons.'_ At just the last second Alzak and Bisca hit the target in the purple feline's paws. Ending the match with the spouses tying for first place.

Cursing to himself Shai heads for the skies once more, now focused and back on the task at hand. Though his goals have changed a tad. Instead of making the date end with Romeo and Wendy not getting together.

He just decides to kill the boy! He's angered him long enough, his annoying luck, reminding him terribly of the Salamander. **"That is IT!"** This one had to work! The two were going on those stupid water rides.

So using the majority of his magic he takes human form, specifically as one of the attendants to said ride. Knocking out one of them without anyone looking in the process. **"Ahem, let me just check to make sure you're all strapped in."** Wendy and Romeo chose the back of the cart.

No one was looking, all Shai had to do was make a little nick in the seatbelt strap, from there the sheer speed and velocity of the ride would force his seatbelt to break off, causing the boy to plummet to his doom.

Probably the most simplistic and down right dirty tactic he's pulled all day. Of course though, something JUST had to go wrong. He wasn't even able to successfully cut the belt protecting Romeo's stomach.

Now Shai has gone through many things in his life, most involving life or death situations, but this moment right here was pure torture. His legs pants got caught on the back of the cart.

 **"Um-uh hey can someone-"** It was too late, the ride started, dragging him with it. While everyone screamed in joy and from the fun of the ride Shai was screaming bloody murder, wanting to be released.

Indeed he was, his pants ripping off and gravity sending him into the water. **"OH! FORGET IT!"** Changing back into his small furry form he made the perilous journey back to his mistress who was still in the guildhall.

Dutifully she was at one of the tables writing and editing her notes with Lucy. Both having huge deadlines to make. No longer caring for his manners and sophisticated etiquette he plots down into the seat next to his owner.

She takes a glance at him, a small eyebrow and smile in the making peeking through. **"What on earth have you been doing?"** He whimpers and mews from the pain. **"Call a healer...please?"** Placing her pen down she pulls out her comm lacrima. **"Wendy?"**

He shakes his head. **"No...she's having a wonderful time on her date."** He was too tired to make his tone sounding bitter and full of hatred, instead rested his exhausted head on the chair.

His moment of peace ruined of course by his enemy. Happy, who decides to get a little payback, landing on Shai's literal back. **"Aye sir I win!"** Enraged the purple exeede bucks Happy off.

Creating a dust cloud where the only sounds were of ominous growls. Lucy and Sonya watch, each wearing expressions of surprise, even more so when the fight suddenly stops. Happy panting and holding himself in pain.

While his purple counterpart was just...standing there. A lightbulb lit up above his head as he now understood why his day and ideas went so terribly wrong. Happy didn't have a collar on. Now that he focused on the jewelry he felt dark magic fill it.

Ripping off the white collar he threw it far, just barely hitting Mirajane. **"You-you manipulative, arrogant bitch...you gave me a cursed collar!"** She smiled. **"I have no idea what you mean Shai."** Blue eyes stared hard at the enraged kitty cat.

Having had enough, he screeched, colliding into the white haired mage even before she was able to transform. All his pent up frustrations blew up as he scratched, bit and punched all of his aggressions into her.

Moving too fast for her to really grab and get ahold of him. No one made a move to assist her, as one she was a powerful s-class mage and could handle herself. Other factors including not messing with an enraged Shai, and simply revenge.

Though Mira technically was in the right with protecting Wendy and Romeo's date, it still didn't make up for what she had done last year. Many just sat back and watched the show, including her boyfriend Laxus who still twitched sparks the moment the incident was brought up.

 **"Well then, I think that we've done more than enough Lucy."** Sonya stands up from her seat, collecting her works, not even taking care of the mini war behind her. **"Shai I will be on my date, please contact my lacrima if you need me."** Lucy stares at her boss in absolute shock.

Even more shocking was Sonya's flying murderous cat replying back with no concern at all. **"Have a good evening milady~ I will see you when you return home! Now...DIEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"** The editor knew she was going to receiving quite the story when she gets back to her home. She couldn't wait~

The end

 **Author Notes: Man this was long...and was finished the day before the deadline whoo! That took a lot outta me, and I'm so tired! I still have one more day to get one final one shot done and then boom! We gotta...nother, month. *Groans...***

 **Curse the holidays and all their gloriousness! Well guys that's it for now, if you like this please feel free to fav/follow/review as Sen and I(Mako) would greatly appreciate the support. Ok tchao for now!**


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